Week 25: First time mom naivete
As I prepare for motherhood, there’s a lot to think […]
Enjoying my last child-free days on the beach. I have no misconception that going to the beach with kids is the same as without kids!
But there are a few things…a few nasty rumors I’m hearing, and they are tales of experience from veteran moms. Things like “I can’t remember the last time we had a date night,” or sentences that start with “Just wait until you…” When I hear woeful anecdotes that warn of the doomsday that will be my life once I’m a mom, I automatically shut down. I refuse to listen. I tell myself- and perhaps I am at fault here- that those things will not happen to me. I just smile and feel kind of sorry for the person telling me they don’t sleep because I will be different.
I crack myself up.
For posterity, I’ve collected a list of things that will never happen to me when I’m a mom. I’m sure I will look back on this list and laugh. First time moms-to-be, maybe you can relate. Experienced moms, I hope you get a good laugh out of this.
- I will still do my hair and makeup every day. She will sit in the bouncy seat while I fill in my eyebrows and flat iron my hair.
- I won’t be the mom with the screaming child in Target. She’ll be snug inside the Ergo baby carrier, happy and content.
- I won’t be strict about nap times and schedules. I will be the carefree mom who never declines social engagements due to nap time.
- I’ll cook dinner every night and it won’t be out of a box. We will continue to buy and consume fresh produce every week.
- My house will always be picked up. How hard can it be to throw a bunch of toys into the toy box and wipe down the counters?
- My car will not have Cheerios smashed into the seats. We will vacuum it every Saturday.
- We won’t be late to social engagements, or work, or church, or anything. I’ll begin getting both myself and the baby ready to go, hours in advance.
- I won’t call the pediatrician every time she has a sniffle. I won’t be a worrier.
Maybe the biggest lie that I tell myself, the one that all of these ideas stem from: I won’t change. Becoming a mom is terrifying in that you don’t know what you’re getting into. All the books that tell you “what to expect” are just a mere outline to be filled in by your own unique experiences. Fifteen weeks to go—eek! Can you tell I’m getting nervous?