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Untold, annoying little side effects

Written by: Hillary Grigonis April 22 2012 I have the hiccups. But I don't just have the hiccups, I have the hiccups at least once every hour. Like clockwork. Luckily, they tend to go away in a few minutes, but like feeding a stray cat, they always come back. Sometimes as very attractive hiccup-burps. Okay,...

Written by: Hillary Grigonis

I have the hiccups. But I don't just have the hiccups, I have the hiccups at least once every hour. Like clockwork. Luckily, they tend to go away in a few minutes, but like feeding a stray cat, they always come back. Sometimes as very attractive hiccup-burps. Okay, so the hiccups are not the end of the world (I never was a drama queen), but when you are just starting to hit the downward slope of the worst of the nausea, random diaphragm flinches are not all that pleasant.

Speaking of not all that pleasant, I'm finding a rather long list of pregnancy side effects that no one ever mentioned. The first time my arms went numb, my initial thought was that 23 is too young to have a heart attack, so it must be pregnancy related. A quick Google search and bam, frequent falling-asleep-feeling-in-the-limbs is added to the list.

Oh, people tell you all about the nausea, strange midnight cravings, bloating and crying over things like a mistake in a sandwich order. But there's also a long list of surprises (that I'm sure probably will get longer as I get into the third trimester and then the delivery room). Of course, frequent gas isn't really a great conversation starter either. I can just imagine how quickly that could end a casual conversation (I mean the discussion of it, not the actual, uh, release).

And…what was I saying? Oh, yeah. Add forgetfulness to the list. Sometimes, I feel like I'm in a fog. I have to write down all the questions that I have for the doctor when I go in to my appointments, otherwise I will never remember, even if its only two or three things. And even when I'm not in a pregnancy induced fog, nine times out of ten whatever it is I'm thinking about is baby related.

I'm just waiting for more of the pleasant side effects to start, like when I can feel the baby move (though I imagine as the living quarters shrinks, that becomes an unpleasant side effect when you take a kick to the bladder). And when I actually start to look pregnant (yes for some reason I am looking forward to that). Of course with my luck, the baby will probably get the hiccups at the same time I do, then my diaphragm and my tummy will both feel like a very poorly executed dance move.

On the positive side, that one side effect called the “glow,” I think that may be real. My family and close friends can tell by my voice (or the color in my face) that I'm feeling better and that I'm happy. Which I am, annoying little side effects and bigger unpleasant trips to the ER all considered. I've wanted this for a long time. Hold on, I have the hiccups again.