Written by: Christopher Spicer June 07 2012
I love my son. For the most part, I’ve really enjoyed being a parent. It has been several times easier than I ever imagined it would be. My life has definitely got a lot busier. It can be a little scary knowing that the guy who once walked around his apartment almost naked (I wore shoes because the place had many broken bottles) is now responsible for a caring for a precious life. Most days if you ask me if I regret being parent or if I would ever trade it in for a childless life, I’d tell you there wasn’t a chance and I’m really happy with how things have turned out. This doesn’t mean there aren’t things that I miss and parts of my pre-parent life that I wish I could have back. Here are a few things that I miss since Everett has come into our lives.
Hassle Free Quiet Dinner Dates: Dinner dates haven’t been completely eliminated. I’ve still been able to sneak in some dates with my beautiful wife. Before Everett, it could be a spur of a moment decision because we decided we don’t want to cook. Now, we need to plan ahead so that we can arrange for someone to look after Everett, and then that means we have to watch how long we are out. Everett is really easy going, and so we have often brought him with us, but he is still a baby. This almost always means Emily has to stop her meal to feed Everett or one of us has to hold him because he has tired of his stroller or bassinet. Oh what wonderful days we had when we could just run off to a restaurant and eat a meal without any interruptions.
Being Able to Go Out when Emily is Gone: At one time if Emily already had plans but they didn’t include me, it wasn’t any big deal because it just meant I could arrange a night out with friends. Or it meant that I got some time to myself where I could eat pizza in my underwear and not have any responsibilities to worry about. Now, we’ve got this little man that needs our attention, and society tells us that our dog isn’t a proper caregiver. When Emily is off to Australian Rules football, then I’ve got myself a night with Everett. I love nights with my son, but I do miss when I didn’t need to coordinate with Emily as much and could leave the house with minimal planning.
Being Lazy: Sometimes there is nothing better in the entire world than doing nothing. Now, I’m either writing pay copy or looking after my son or squeezing in housework. If I am watching TV or reading things on the internet, it is so that I have material for future articles or because I am trying to keep on top of the mediums of which I’m an “expert.” Everything now seems to be for a purpose and I just miss the times that I got to turn off my brain for a few minutes.
Spontaneity: This is similar to the dinner date problem, but it covers anything. If we want to run out to see a random movie or go for a nice romantic walk or just pop over to say “hi” to a friend or suddenly get the urge to spend a weekend at Niagara Falls, we now have major factors to think about. Everett has finally fallen asleep after a rough day, and so we don’t want to risk waking him up to go for a walk. Movie theatres and romantic weekends aren’t spectacular baby places, and so we need to hope someone is willing to look after Everett at the last minute. Everything needs to be planned out now, and it has to be planned out far ahead. I like being a spur of the moment person, but Everett has forced us to actually use our calendar.
Late Nights: This was fading away anyway, because I’m becoming old and cranky. I now can’t just go out with friends and not worry about the time I’ll be home. It may be Everett’s bath night or Emily has been looking after him for a long time or I just can’t stay up too late because Everett made sure the previous night lacked sleep. The days of all night partying are officially over (though they may have never really existed, but now they never will).
These are a few of the things that have been scrapped thanks to Everett’s arrival. I would never ever think to trade in Everett to get them back, but I do miss them sometimes. What are the things that you miss now that you have a little bundle of joy in your life?