Meet our newKnocked Up blogger—our very own Associate Editor Tracy Brown!
I’ve always been the one in my family who rocks out surprises. Ever since I was old enough to party plan, there has been nary a birthday, graduation or anniversary that didn’t include impromptu visitors, crazy decorations and at least one unbelievable surprise moment. I’m usually the schemer, the multi-tasker and the planner, and if I do say so myself, I am quite good at it. So imagine my complete shock when the biggest surprise of my life happened to me unexpectedly.
Yes, there I was: 5 A.M., test stick in hand, two-days late and pretty sure I was gazing at a faint pink line on the pregnancy test I was holding. Having always been fond of memorable moments, I had planned out the way I would tell my husband the news since … well, before I even had a husband. I had taken to heart an episode of Full House (Remember that show?) where Rebecca told Uncle Jessee she was expecting by making a surprise meal of baby peas, baby carrots, baby corn, etc. “Genius,” I thought even way back then. So as I stood there staring at that stick, I knew the rational thing to do would be to hold in the news until I could confirm that I was indeed pregnant in just enough time to put together a meal of baby themed dishes. The other irrational side of me, however, maybe due to the cold tile under my feet or the need to share this news with another human being, caused me to burst out of the bathroom and run to my husband, who was still sleeping and exclaim, “Uh … do these look like two pink lines to you?”
Still half asleep and with squinty eyes, he gazed at the information in a bit of a haze. I guess you could say I surprised him, as he had no clue that I had snuck out of our cozy bed to confirm suspicions he didn’t even know I was having.
“Looks like it,” he replied.
Still unsure that we had actually created a child (a love child as my best friends would say), I proceeded to buy two more boxes of tests after work. Let’s just say, I should have only bought one. Lo and behold, the first test I took gave me a gleaming positive sign and there was no denying the news that we were indeed, expecting our first little love child. Being the emotional mess that I usually am, tears of joy immediately sprang from my eyes. I was going to have a baby.
Though we had talked about having babies in the next few years, we had both agreed that we needed to take some time to find our financial bearings, establish our careers (the ones we had both recently started) and learn to navigate our way around the new city that we had recently decided to call home. I found each element vitally important to conquer before we started to try. Yet, all of a sudden in one unbelievable moment, none of those factors mattered anymore at all. I was given a surprise gift that I needed and wanted more than I had even known. Calmly and whole-heartedly, I just knew all of those things we were unsure about would somehow sort themselves out. It was completely the right time for our family to start and I have never been happier in my whole entire life.
The surprise was finally on me. The only thing that matters now is the little Baby Brown I will be carrying for the next nine months. Boy, do I have a lot of planning to do.
I am so excited that I get to share my amazing journey through pregnancy with you at the very same time that you’re going through yours. I promise to open my heart about everything I am thinking, feeling, worrying about and trying. And I hope you will share your experiences with me as well. I can’t wait to hear them.
Lots of Love,
Looking for our previous Knocked Up blogger, Suzanna? Stay tuned for news of her baby’s birth and the next stage of her journey as she continues sharing her story at our Adventures in Motherhood blog beginning Monday, October 3.