Questions asked by a new father
Why would anyone refer to a pacifier as an “artificial […]
- Why would anyone refer to a pacifier as an “artificial nipple?”
- When my baby smiles at me, is he smiling because he has a secret? I get the feeling that he knows how to walk and talk, but he just wants to see me mumble and sing songs for a few more months.
What do hipsters do with their dogs after they replace them with children? We have all noticed that hipster-owned pets are rarely at the farmer’s market once their owners have kids. What happened to them?
What do hipsters do with their dogs after they replace them with children? We have all noticed that hipster-owned pets are rarely at the farmer’s market once their owners have kids. What happened to them?- What is butt paste, and will I die if I eat it?
- My baby likes being swaddled because it reminds him of being in the womb. My baby also enjoys peeing on the wall while having his diaper changed. Explain this.
- Our pediatrician informs us that our baby falls into the 75th percentile in “head size.” Is this something they normally measure, or is she just being mean?
- Can butt paste be used for arts and crafts projects?
- When babies have gas, they scream at everyone until they feel better. At what age do we lose that right?
- My son’s shirt says “I was born awesome.” Why do we condone baby arrogance?
