Best places to be

Hi readers, this is Everett here. My dad is swamped with work this week. Since that means he isn’t playing with me, I’m going to take over his column for today. I realize some of you are so busy that you don’t have time to leave the house. Don’t feel bad, because homes have some great locations to explore and play. Here are my favorite places to go in the house.

Underneath Furniture: Are you tired of playing with your toys on your blanket? Is your mommy (parents have mommies, right?) looking the other way and you’re in the mood for an impromptu hide-and-go-seek? Have you seen enough of the same ceiling? It is a whole new magical world when you slide under a couch or table; just don’t decide to sit up.

Bath Tub: Greatest place in the entire universe. Though I admit my universe basically consists of my house and the mall mommy keeps dragging me to. I only get to go to swim lessons once a week, and so this place is great for perfecting my splashing and bubble blowing the rest of the time. Plus I like to help my daddy get clean by giving him as much of my bath water as possible.

Crib: Psst…here is a secret, I actually really love being in here. I have a stuffed giraffe to hug, zebras to discuss important topics like toys, and several flying animals that I enjoy watching go in circles. I just cry because I don’t want my parents to over sleep—it isn’t good for them.

Blankets: I like chilling on a bed or couch, but I love adventuring underneath the blankets even more. A blanket makes a magnificent fort. I also love hiding from mommy and daddy, and tricking them into thinking I’m some guy named, “Boo”. It cracks me up every time.

High Chair: I’m not a big fan of the “being strapped up, not being able to crawl, and far away from my toys” part of the chair. The chair means food, and food is good—for eating and spraying in daddy’s face.

Toilet: It is really scary, because it is high and I could fall in. The best part about the toilet is if I even hint at crying, then my daddy makes the silliest noises and allows me to squeeze his nose. This stuff is comic gold.

In My Parents’ Arms: Because they love me, and I love them.