The up and up

I can’t believe we are already in the month of May. May is a particularly big month in our household. There are so many things going on! Not only do my birthday, Jesse’s birthday and Mother’s Day happen this month, but also this year feels particularly special. We are supposedly, hopefully, finally closing on our house. And perhaps by the time you read this, we will have done so! Please send good juju our way!
Also, in recent news, I’ve just gotten a job and am feeling really excited and nervous about it simply because I’ve been mom-ing it for quite some time now and am actually diving into a new career path. The beauty of this is that I have the flexibility and ability to work from the comfort of my own home. I don’t have to worry about leaving the kids with a caretaker and setting aside time to pump. I have the best of both worlds—staying home with the kids while working.
And here’s the thing about where I stand with regard to work: I need it. I am in awe of the moms out there who stay home and have figured out their groove by seamlessly managing a household with children. I, however, am not that mom. I’ve learned over time that while I love being at home with the kids, I do feel like there are moments when I’ve kind of neglected my needs. This is something I’ve struggled with for several years. There’s some guilt in working and another kind of guilt in staying at home. And all this guilt is completely and utterly self-inflicted, as I’m sure other moms out there understand. Jesse has been an amazing pillar of support both as a husband and a father. He’s encouraged me to go after what I want to do while at the same time assuring me that my staying home with the kids is the reason they’re so happy. But I’m doing it and I’m going to work hard to rock this new role because I want to and feel that I’d thrive!
Another thing that has happened in the last week is that we booked tickets for Canada this summer! I have relatives who live close to Niagara Falls and Toronto, and we are having a family reunion in July. It’ll be Akira’s first international trip which means he got his first passport photo taken over the weekend. When Anaïs was roughly his age, I had applied for her passport, too. By the time we leave, Akira will be just a few weeks shy of turning one. Isn’t that insane!? I’m just thrilled that he’ll have his first airline trip abroad (albeit just over the border) before his first birthday!
As I said, so much is happening. It always feels like a lot happens in the month of May for both Jesse and me. There are changes that are continuing to shape our family, and we are constantly evolving. As Jesse says, “We’re on the up and up,” and I couldn’t agree more.