The past week we had some big changes happening over here. My three-year-old daughter started preschool. I’ve been fortunate enough to have limited child care for Matilda. This will be the first time that she’s been away from me consistently since I started staying home with her (before that my sweet Mama was keeping her). We dabbled in Mother’s Morning Out this summer (why did I wait so long?) but that’s pretty much the extent of it.
When we found out we were expecting this fall it seemed like a great idea to introduce something new and special to our eldest. We had already discussed preschool, but this fall now seemed like a no-brainer. Our thinking was that with all of the change of having a newborn that Matilda needed something that was just hers. Preschool would be exciting and new and decidedly un-babyish.
From orientation I could tell that preschool was pretty serious business. I mean, there were people with legitimate video equipment…at ORIENTATION. There was hardly a chance for me to sign up for the Valentine’s party because all of the other slots were filled. I felt like I wasn’t “mom enough.” Know what I mean? Then I started to panic when they were talking about carpool and I was picturing myself loading a newborn in and out of the car twice a day, three times a week. It’ll be fine, right? Totally fine. I can do this.
It just seems like everything is changing all at once. We’re adding another life to the mix, allowing our current baby to grow and flourish away from us, and pretty much letting go of any sense of control we’ve allowed ourselves to pretend that we have.
Did you find yourself at a crossroads with your second baby (or third, fourth), where it just seemed like everything was changing so much at once?
